Being a CSIS Study Subject

(Below are some of my thoughts and experiences around ‘9/11’, as well as a synopsis of my ‘surveillance years’, followed by a list of CSIS Controversies (excerpted from the CSIS Wikipedia page) – for which I could submit many, far more heinous, crimes by CSIS.)


Immediately after the ‘9-11’ attacks took place on September 11, 2001, I started receiving cogent news articles that questioned the ‘official story’ being put out by then-President George W. Bush and his administration. Critical thinkers called on the U.S. government to investigate the tragedy more deeply, with such an outpouring of shock, grief, and outrage.

I tried to distribute various information to anyone who was interested – despite my already being under illegal, corrupt, and increasingly threatening and injurious surveillance, presumably by CSIS, and later the FBI (who has long had a presence in Canada, but understandably stepped things up following the catastrophic World Trade Centre attacks).

(An explanation of how I could possibly have come under FBI surveillance was sent to a smaller group recently; but is also contained in an old blog I wrote 15 years ago. I may resend.)

I eventually participated in the 9/11 Truth Movement by attending a U.S.-Canada ‘Citizens’ Inquiry Into 9/11′, which started in San Francisco, then came to Toronto, and finally concluded in New York.

While participating in the post-conference Call to Action in Toronto, I engaged in discussions with award-winning journalist and film producer Barrie Zwicker and others, mostly to find like-minded activists and to also draw attention to my surveillance plight, and to communicate how all this would be and likely is impacting Canadian whistleblowers and activist communities, the general public, media and, ultimately, bi-national politics (Canada-U.S.).

That sounds extremely grandiose (not unlike Grant Bristow was, apparently, about his CSIS work in helping to co-found Canada’s largest white supremacist group – “Grant Bristow, CSIS and the Heritage Front : Good for Business” (1994)). However, my personal vision and hopes for society had evolved over time into a utopian ideal of socio-environmental healing, balance, diversity, empowerment, wholeness, and participatory democracy informed by higher consciousness values and pursuits – all based on actual, real-life examples (Mohandas K. Gandhi, Oprah Winfrey, Kiran Bedi and also Anna Hazare – I will be posting more about these transformative leaders later).

And when I joined an interdisciplinary Environmental Studies many years ago, for the first time in my life, I was surrounded by a whole slew of really switched-on people who think ‘outside the box’, and who are both passionate and motivated to help bring about a green planet and healthy world.

CSIS clamped down on that, too, with a few existing ‘plants’ and a change in the faculty’s administrative leadership.

Diversity and democracy are challenging. Yet, this faculty has so much potential to become a ‘Living School’, learning from its existing environments (social, natural, built, organizational, etc), and applying their vast collective knowledge, wide-ranging experiences, innovative ideas, and sheer energy toward making their large campus and its surrounding, underprivileged communities into an integrated, flourishing, healthful eco-paradise.

By the way, I’ll be posting dribs and drabs of the resurging anomalies and subtle personal threats, I’m once again experiencing. I will also try to describe how my CRAZY SELF, PERSONAL VISION, ECLECTIC INTERESTS, and OVERALL LIFE PATH could be such a compelling case study for CSIS and the FBI.

Anyway, as most people start to realize with time and age, getting to heaven can be pure hell. Promoting socio-environmental transformation and fulfilling our collective potentials requires constant facilitation processes, with checks and balances to help ensure equitable and optimal systemic change. Unfortunately, in times of chaos – which globalization has brought about (even Forbes magazine agrees!) – humans always fall back on the ‘old order’ and top-down management, out of fear. Yet wise and innovative approaches are needed to facilitate complex, biodiverse, and widespread metamorphoses for all living (and non-living) entities on this planet.

That’s a HUGE discussion. In 1998, while globalization still seemed rosy to some, I spent almost a year in severe depression and suffered a ‘crisis of faith’, after leaving a good airline job in Asia and all my international ‘New Age’ friends and others, to further reflect on how I could become more actively involved in environmental healing and restoration (a looming crisis I first learned of, and felt urgency about, in 1981). After witnessing first-hand the impacts of globalization in disparate countries, I sought an “effective solution” to address the myriad social, economic, political and environmental challenges. I came upon Canadian co-operative organizations (here’s a history of the Canadian co-op movement), and thus, learned of the ICA and the international co-operative movement.

(My surveillance began prior to that over my passport (I could hardly believe it). Being a woman of colour and Asian ancestry, travelling in many off-beaten paths where I was the only foreigner around, I specifically wanted my passport renewal ISSUED IN CANADA and not Hong Kong or SE Asia, for fear of being identified as an affluent Asian tourist from Hong Kong, Taiwan, or Japan (the ultimate ‘weekend sightseer’). There were incidents of robbery, drugging, kidnapping, and occasionally murder of such travellers and even native-born Chinese residents in the various countries I was backpacking in. And I experienced some of the animosity first-hand.)

Two years later, after my travels and studies in India, followed by 2 years in Environmental Studies, fast forward to the year that changed the world…

According to the 9/11 Truth Movement Wiki page:

Adherents of the 9/11 Truth movement are conspiracy theorists who dispute the mainstream account of the September 11 attacks of 2001. …[And] support for the movement is negligible from professionals in relevant fields, such as civil and aerospace engineering.[17]

Yet clearly, what we “conspiracy theorists” have been fighting for all along is a thorough, unobstructed, and truthful investigation into the events surrounding the World Trade Centre attack and its casualties. And finally, a pivotal piece of information has finally come to light. The Fire Commissioner’s meeting, which took place on July 24, 2019, completely upends the ‘Official Version’ of 9/11 events – and yet, even the ‘9/11 Truth Movement’ Wiki page still maintains the ‘official line’, despite being edited as recently as 8 days ago (November 9, 2019).

In other words, it could seem like a media blackout that the ever-hungry mainstream news media has completely ignored the Fire Commissioner’s announcement of explosives being used in the ‘9-11’ tragedy, which would point to help from the inside, or an “inside job”.

(And ‘War for Oil’ theories abounded among 9/11 skeptics in 2001. This is a simple analysis of how oil has been a major incentive to engage in war, since World War II.)

Kindly remember: The ‘9-11’ attacks were the critical event that cast the whole world in a new light (ISIS and a jihadist terrorism network); and launched key wars abroad (Iraq, Afghanistan); AND (along with gun access, violent video games / TV media, and sensationalism, of course) has possibly made both the U.S. and Canada more conducive to increased violence and acts of ‘domestic terrorism’. (In America: “F.B.I. Confirms Sharp Rise in Mass Shootings Since 2000” – New York Times***; this Wikipedia list of U.S. mass shootings is clearer. In Canada: the 2018 van attack, and the Danforth mass shooting. Such rampages are usually perpetrated by individuals who are either alienated, oppressed, disillusioned, distraught, fanatical, etc, which in my view is symptomatic of our ailing society.)

[***NOTE: If you prefer not to give your personal email address to subscribe/login to the New York Times article, you can use .]

And post-2001, there may be some people with ties to communities abroad, who may support terrorist activities and such; and a few sympathizers from Canada and the U.S. have joined extremist groups on the battlefield and elsewhere. Yet there are also others with economic and political agendas within the global sphere, who have vested business interests in war-mongering – so not only targeted people, like Muslims, but people who benefit from world conflict and upheaval, like then-U.S. vice president Dick Cheney, former CEO of Halliburton (“Halliburton’s ‘Sweetheart’ Deal in Iraq”; and Cheney’s $34 million payday leading up to ‘9-11’).

Halliburton is a large oil field service multinational operating in 70 countries, and its former subsidiary, “KBR, is a major construction company of refineries, oil fields, pipelines, and chemical plants“; both companies gained extensive contracts in Iraq, as a direct result of “9/11 counter-attacks”.

60 Minutes’ broadcasted a TV report in 2003, entitled, ‘Doing Business With The Enemy‘.

Trump is another subject of my recent long-winded rants.

This quote from GQ Magazine may best capture what Dick Cheney and U.S. President Donald Trump have in common:

“…the vice president [Dick Cheney] again sabotaged the democratic system…to remove some of the most effective staff and replace them with his own loyal supplicants—undercutting America’s best effort at war in order to expand his own power.”

The current impeachment hearings are almost heartbreaking to watch all these truly dedicated, patriotic people – many of whom have served for decades and represent the best of America’s civil service – being forced to come forward and speak about the degenerating state of security, government conduct, America’s sovereignty, and an increasingly flouted constitution. The indirect threats to former Ukraine Ambassador Marie Yovanovitch’s well-being made by President Trump has had a “chilling effect” on U.S. State Department staff.

Anyway, I digress.

What began as low-level monitoring of my life and wiretapping, gradually escalated into full-blown 24/7 video surveillance and harassment. Things had stepped up, after I moved to a low-rise apartment in August 2000, as I had made concerted efforts to elude Big Brother or whoever was interfering with my life (both at home and online).

Then, after the World Trade Center attacks in 2001, and given my activist propensities, intelligence and security agencies had full license to not only spy upon EVERYONE’S lives, but to also work in close collaboration with corporations, governments and organizations of all sizes to achieve their true objective: increasing and total social control. (Stay tuned for more on that.)

My surveillance began in 1998 – 3 years before ‘9/11’ – and lasted until 2005. It was a real learning curve for me. The ridiculous observation of my life, gradually escalated into all-out psychological terrorism, physical sabotage and intentional harm.

(BY THE WAY, I WILL BE DISCUSSING MORE ABOUT THESE ISSUES IN RELATION TO MY CURRENT JOB. The threats, intimidation, and collusion have resurfaced, as I have recently started to recount my surveillance experiences again to others – in order to explain my mental health struggles, like PTSD, hypervigilance, and social anxiety.)

My at-times uncontrollable tendency to challenge or disrupt authority and others, while striving to protect both my life and my privacy from Big Brother, combined with my eclectic activities and seemingly subversive thinking (around planetary healing, social transformation, holistic health,  action learning and transformative learning (these are Jack Mezirow’s Ten Phases), organizational change, cooperative development, ethical polyamory, etc) have made me an interesting subject.

But by 2003, I had become completely broken by the 24/7 scrutiny and intrusive stressors:

  • People I encountered or interacted with, plus many threatening innuendoes and incidents;
  • Missing or malfunctioning belongings;
  • Constant and unusual website / internet / computer occurrences and glitches;
  • Noise of all kinds;
  • Highly perturbing home life, besides the above:
    – a constant barrage of very specific wrong number and crank calls (eg, a man’s voice I recognized from an in-person encounter at work, calling to ask for the ‘Blood Works Dept.’ of ‘Toronto Western Hospital’, while I happened to have 2 bloody kleenexes in front of me and a bloody finger);
    – having my apartment buzzed in the middle of the night;
    – desktop computer turning itself on (!), when I’ve just awakened;
    – no heat or hot water for days at a time in winter;
    – exploding fuses;
    – self-triggering fire alarm (wired, not battery-operated);
    – appliance found ON (3x), doubling my hydro bill;
    – a harassing neighbour beneath me, who drove others away over several years by blasting music (as an attack, not for enjoyment), and dropping a very heavy object – like a bowling ball – repeatedly on the floor; and that same neighbour often slammed their solid-wood door at full force – and these auditory assaults invariably occurred when I was most terrified, literally shaking in my apartment.(Note: Next door to me were other neighbours, either refugees or illegal immigrants from Iran. (They seldom ventured outside and visitors seemed to come in secrecy; and I had heard they were providing sexual favours to our slumlords in lieu of rent, which would explain their willingness to be harrassers.) Apparently, they similarly tormented their neighbour directly below them (an elderly Irish-Canadian woman I became friends with), until she and her son were forced out of the building. That’s another complicated story, which may seem banal, and yet is indirectly woven into a wider web of illegal surveillance, intimidation, persecution, and abuse.)

So, why continue to persecute me, once security agencies realized I was not engaged in any illegal activities?

Well, I represent all of the things described in that link above – plus I’m a general sh*t-disturber; and I was enrolled in Environmental Studies with a lot of activists; I tend to think ‘outside the box’; my life experiences are diverse; I am Chinese-Canadian and my family and relatives have been in Canada / U.S. a long time, most are either born and / or educated here – our parents either came in the 50s and 60s, or a couple are descended several generations since the 1800s, etc. And yet, here I was struggling and marginalized, like a recently landed immigrant of colour. Oh, I was a very good *study subject* for CSIS and the FBI.

But in spite of my many challenges and personal unravelling, I tried my hardest to expose what are not merely transgressions or corrupt practices by ‘security’ agencies, but the complete downfall of western civilization and democracy.

As you read through, you may see that these seemingly unconnected ‘incidents’ are far from happenstance.

There were also various psychopathic events, in which terrible things happened.

Yet everything that was happening to me stopped in Fall 2005, when I finally had a nervous breakdown and went into hospital (the first of many stays). My credibility was forever damaged; and the people, incidents, anomalies, and threats all went into *instant* remission for over 8 years.

This Canadian man, Roderick Russell, offers a far more sane and powerful summary of everything I have likewise experienced and tried, time and again, to tell people: .

( A MUST-READ. If he sounds excitable and extreme, I myself know it’s because when *psychological terrorism*, and indeed “‘no-touch’ torture”, is happening to you, it’s near-impossible to sound calm and rational about it.)



The neutrality of this section is disputed. Relevant discussion may be found on the talk page. Please do not remove this message until conditions to do so are met(April 2013) (Learn how and when to remove this template message)

In several instances, CSIS has been accused of misrepresenting facts to the Courts.[28] In 2013, CSIS was censured by Federal Court Judge Richard Mosley for deliberately misleading Canada’s Federal Court to make it possible for them to allow other agencies to spy on Canadians abroad, which is not allowed by Canadian law.[29] “Justice Mosley has found that CSIS breached its duty of candour to the Court by not disclosing information that was relevant,” the Federal Court stated in a press release.[30]

CSIS has also been involved in cases where evidence has been mishandled or omitted from the Courts. In 2009, it was alleged that the service did not disclose information that their confidential informants, which CSIS had been relying on to gather information about their targets, were either deceptive,[clarification needed] or failed lie-detector tests.[31] This was not an isolated case, and in several other instances, the agency mishandling of evidence has also called for investigation.[32][33]

CSIS has, at times, come under criticism,[by whom?] such as for its role in the investigation of the 1985 Air India bombing. The Commission of Inquiry into the Investigation of the Bombing of Air India Flight 182, headed by Justice John Major, is underway. Two Canadian courts have publicly criticized CSIS for destroying wiretap evidence. One court impressed upon the importance of wiretap evidence from CSIS in establishing guilt. The second focused on its exculpatory value.[citation needed]

From 1988 to 1994, CSIS mole Grant Bristow infiltrated the Canadian white-supremacist movement. When the story became public knowledge, the press aired concerns that he had not only been one of the founders of the Heritage Front group, but that he had also channelled CSIS funding to the group.[34]

In 1999, classified documents were stolen from the car of a CSIS employee who was attending a Toronto Maple Leafs hockey game. The Security Intelligence Review Committee reportedly investigated this incident.[35][36]

On September 18, 2006, the Arar Commission absolved CSIS of any involvement in the extraordinary rendition by the United States of a Canadian citizen, Maher Arar.[citation needed] The Commission found that U.S. authorities sent Arar to Jordan and then Syria (his country of birth) based on incorrect information which had been provided by the Royal Canadian Mounted Police (RCMP) to the U.S. government. Arar was held by the Syrians for one year and was tortured. The sole criticism of CSIS leveled by the Commission was that the agency should do more to critically examine information provided by regimes which practice torture.[citation needed]

On March 31, 2009, CSIS lawyer and advisor Geoffrey O’Brian told the Committee on Public Safety and National Security that CSIS would use information obtained by torture if it could prevent another attack such as 9/11 or the Air India bombing. Testifying before the same committee two days later, Director of CSIS Jim Judd said that O’Brian “may have been confused” and “venturing into a hypothetical”, and would send the committee a clarifying letter.[37] Two weeks later CSIS announced that Judd would be retiring in June, five months before the end of his five-year term.[38]

CSIS has come under attack on a number of occasions for what is seen by some as very aggressive tactics. A vociferous critic of the Service, Lawyer Faisal Kutty, writes as follows: “Showing up at homes and workplaces unannounced; speaking with employers; offering money and favors for “information”; intimidating and threatening newcomers; questioning about specific institutions and individuals; inquiring about a person’s religiosity; and discouraging people from engaging lawyers are some of the recurring themes that I have come across from clients. The problem is so severe that the Council on American Islamic Relations (Canada) has distributed almost 30,000 Know Your Rights guides and organized 27 workshops across the country on dealing with the Canadian Security Intelligence Service (CSIS) and the Royal Canadian Mounted Police (RCMP).”[39]

Prominent Canadian national security lawyer Barbara Jackman has also been critical, categorizing the research by CSIS as “sloppy” and that its officers are “susceptible to tunnel vision“.[40]

In 2017, several CSIS members accused the organization of having a racist and homophobic workplace culture.[41]

Check, and check (outspoken Asian-Canadian, and feminist bis**ual). I could add a whole new chapter to the rather short list of CSIS Controversies, above

“…former solicitor general Wayne Easter acknowledged the possibility that ‘rogue’ elements of the RCMP may have played a role in [Maher] Arar’s rendition to Syria,­ essentially torture by proxy.”


People would be utterly terrified to know the extent at which their privacy is invaded, recorded, filed away for future use, and both their social lives and individual thinking are closely observed, moulded, manipulated, and ultimately, CONTROLLED. Freedom, democracy, and privacy (plus truth in media) are a complete fantasy.

Millenials, who grew up using so many technologies, are not only used to this new world, but few have any inclination to challenge these hidden workings of power and (try to) demand privacy and security – in any form. Well, it is way too late now, anyway.

China’s Surveillance State Should Scare Everyone

The country is perfecting a vast network of digital espionage as a means of social control—with implications for democracies worldwide.

Like I said, we had to get from point A to B.

While I was hollering about seemingly ‘impossible’ and ‘unlikely’ electronic and digital surveillance and harassment, particularly from 2000 to 2005 (and started a blog about it, raving like a madwoman), social control has been growing by leaps and bounds, around the world.


You may be overwhelmed by ‘terrorism’ discussions by now, but just for balance, I’m including 2 academic articles on the psychological aspects of terrorism.

The first one is probably true, though optimistic. I couldn’t really get through the 2nd one, but it’s highly referenced and exactly the kind of thing that universities expect from their students – rather than real-time action or well-researched applications (as per my frustrations with an interdisciplinary Environmental Studies program many years ago).

  1.  (probably true, and optimistic)

I have to conclude this webpost with a quote from the 2nd article; plus an article by Andrew Mitrovica, an investigative journalist who has extensively researched and written about CSIS:

“…some common points to all terrorists’ acts: use of violence, intention to instill fear, directed toward civilians and intended to be a means to induce changes in people’s political or social positions (p. 14).”  

Who’s watching CSIS? Not Ottawa — and not the media

By Andrew Mitrovica. Published on Mar 16, 2015 8:58pm

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